Back to Bangkok

On December 8, I, along with six other women from Brentwood Church, will head to Bangkok, Thailand, representing Freedom 4/24. We will stay at Beginnings, a safe house for women there and will be throwing two Christmas parties for the girls of Nana Plaza and Soi Cowboy, two of Bangkok’s largest red light districts. These girls and women–sexual slaves–will be shown honor, Christ’s love and a pathway to freedom during these parties. Our team will return Dec. 18. Below are some of my thoughts leading up to this trip…

It’s been two years since I’ve been to Bangkok. For two lightning fast years, I have thought about the girls there nearly every single day–those in the bars, on the streets, and in Beginnings. My heart has ached to go back. And yet…

I’m not ashamed to admit that I’ve been scared to go. A lot has changed in two years. I’m a mom now. In fact, the last time I was in Bangkok, I was just 8 weeks along with our daughter, Ella–sorry blog, I wasn’t ready to tell you at the time.

God has been so good to Daryl and I since our time in Thailand, when we were just a little bit pregnant. And yet…

I fear.

What if something happens to Daryl or Ella while I’m gone? What if something goes wrong while traveling? What if…? The worries–and trust me, I’m not really a worrier–are seemingly endless.

And yet, that’s the point.

The last time I went to Thailand, it was an opportunity to trust in God’s plan and hand of protection on us. I found out just four days before we boarded the plane that we were expecting our sweet Ella. My world was rocked. I should have been panicked. And yet…I was supernaturally calm. Comforted. Completely at peace with going. It was a feeling I had never experienced before–I was completely resting in the fact that God is in control and that His timing is perfect.

Quickly, the trip became anything but about ME. I know it will be the same way this go round too.

It’s just getting there. It’s just obeying.

Two years have gone by in a blessed blink for me. But in the in between, they have likely drug by for the hundreds of thousands of women who are currently in sexual slavery…bound by human hands and twisted intentions. Once you’re exposed to this level of darkness, you have only two options moving forward: fight or flight. Stand up and fight the pervasive evil or run in the opposite direction, hoping to forget what you witnessed.

I can’t help but fight. I have no choice but to trust. My mind and heart won’t ever let me forget. And yet…

My first fight is against myself this time. After that, it’s a fight to reach the hearts and minds of these girls and women who are the lowest of the low in their own society. To show them light. Love. Hope. Freedom.

The fight for freedom is as real today as it was in when I was last in Bangkok in 2009. The number of women enslaved is beyond alarming. Once you become aware–see it with your own eyes or hear stories of these girls who are subjected to every form of demoralization–you either become a part of the problem or a part of the solution.

Despite my fears, I’m ready to do battle. It’s what we, as Christ followers, are called to do. I hope one day Ella will be there beside me, but for now, I’m not afraid to pray for protection. I expect some amazing stories to emerge from our 10 short days there.